So last night Lilsaej and I went to see Black Swan.  All I knew about it was that it had gotten rave reviews and that it starred Natalie Portman as a ballerina fighting off up and comer Mila Kunis. I also knew that it was described as a "Psycho-Sexual Thriller" and that there was a lesbian sex scene (albeit brief) between the 2 ballerinas. My expectations weren't much beyond what little I'd read. 

Here's what you need to know about Black Swan: It's creepy.  Like really motherfucking creepy. And it's gory.  Like I-almost-puked-in-my-popcorn way-too-much-blood-for-a-movie-about-a-ballerina gory.  And it's creepy. Did I mention that? 

On the plus side, if you have ever questioned your mental stability or wondered just how insane you truly were - this movie will put it all into perspective because there is your garden variety OCD and then there is ripping your own skin off OCD.  There is batshit crazy and then there is a full on psychotic break. 

After watching Black Swan, I am pleased to report that I am apparently nowhere near the end of my emotional tether and that despite my occasional rants, I have no intention of actually stabbing anyone. Even those people who really piss me off.

As far as the movie, I am glad I saw it. It was beyond good - well acted, well directed, well edited. The score was fantastic and the juxtaposition of the music with the acting was quite well done.  As awards season starts and everyone goes on and on and about Natalie Portman's and Mila Kunis's performances - I will know what they are talking about and I will probably agree wholeheartedly. 

It was a welcome relief to see Hollywood produce something that wasn't a second third fourth sequel or a remake or a vehicle for some stupid reality TV star.  However...when Black Swan comes out on DVD I doubt that I will purchase it.  It is not exactly the type of movie you watch over and over - unless you enjoy being sucked into a mental breakdown of monumentally epic proportions (See also: Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction slitting her own wrists and/or sitting there flipping the lamp on and off and on and off and on and off and on and off and on and OMFG - MAKE IT STOP!). And while I am at it, I swear on all that is holy in this universe that I never, ever, ever, ever, want to witness a mother undress her grown child and put her to bed. Taking off her kid's earrings? That scarred me more than anything. Dear Lord Barbara Hershey - when did you become so spine-chillingly disturbing? Also? Hello Winona Ryder - I had no idea you were still around.

After the movie ended, Lilsaej and I just turned and looked at one another, not quite sure what to say.  Actually, I think I said something to the effect of: "Wow. Suddenly I am glad to *only* be batshit crazy.  And I think I liked Burlesque better."  And then we hit the local pub for a few pints of Guinness and a sampler platter because holy hell we needed something to take the edge off.

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So do you think she really died? The people I went to see it with are debating. Also, I think she really stabbed Winona and they don't. I now feel self conscious when I brush bratchild's hair thanks to this movie.

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