Some Stupid Shit I've Done Recently - Example 1:

Remember my shiny, new bathroom, Xanadu? Remember my pretty new bathmat?

 9 New bathmat.JPG

My pristine, white bathmat which is no longer pristine because oh yeah it's ON THE FLOOR and not only is it ON THE FLOOR but it takes up most of the space where I walk whenever I enter my bathroom (as in to pee, to wash my hands, to shower, etc,). My no longer pristine, now slightly dingy grey-brown bathmat which HAS TO BE HANDWASHED because while sequins are sparkly and pretty, they are not functional. Do you know how difficult it is to handwash a bathmat? And how long it takes to dry which means that for at least 3 days a week I have something else spread out over the floor serving as a makeshift bathmat? And because I spent OMG obscene amounts of money on said bathmat, I refuse to stick it in a drawer and get something more functional. Sigh.

Some Stupid Shit I've Done Recently - Example 2:

I bought pizza-flavored hummus. And before you get all Baron Von Judgenstein on me it's essentially hummus flavored with tomato so it's not really pizza hummus - it's more like tomato hummus. Only - it's as disgusting as it sounds so really - go ahead and give me your most Baron Von Judgenstein withering glare.

Some Stupid Shit I've Done Recently - Example 3:

Remember that time I went shopping while I was out at a bar? You think I would have learned my lesson and packed a small, stylish overnight bag (think of the Mark Cross bag that Grace Kelly shows Jimmy Stewart in Rear Window) to keep in my car in case I am having too much fun and decide to have one or more drinks of emergency. You know: a toothbrush, clean underwear, a t-shirt to sleep in, a dress to throw on the next day.  The basics. Well it happened. Again.  I was having so much fun at the martini party I attended on Friday night which was a big welcome home for Ciel and The Professor, that I wound up staying with our gracious hostess and host, The Actress and Dr. Doolitle. Which was not a huge deal because the next day was Saturday and nobody at the Bojangles drive through judged me for being in a sparkly dress and Jimmy Choos but still: I know me. I need that Mark Cross overnight bag stat. PS The NOT STUPID thing I do is decide not to drive.

Some Stupid Shit I've Done Recently - Example 4:   

I lost my sunglasses in a tubing incident. My precious, beloved, most perfect shape/style/size Ralph Lauren sunglasses are now sitting on the bottom of Lake Norman somewhere and I am pretty pissed about the whole thing mainly because - NO ONE TOLD ME THAT TUBING WITH SUNGLASSES WAS A STUPID FUCKING IDEA. Although in my defense, this was the tube:

Big Mabel 1.jpg

Big Mable.  Very much like a bed where you can sit upright, rest your back/head, and even hold onto a frosty beverage as you get towed around the lake.  Unless you have a kamikaze driver who is intent on making you capsize in which case when you get violently thrown from the tube and plummet several feet under water you will mainly be grateful that you are wearing a life vest and the fact that your precious, beloved, most perfect shape/style/size Ralph Lauren sunglasses now belong to a fish will temporarily not bother you.  But then it will bother you tremendously and it's less about the money and more about the fact that really good sunglasses are impossible to find and those were perfect. But then a few hours later another girl will get tossed from Big Mable only she will clunk heads with the other rider and wind up with a giant blue lump above her right eye and that will finally give you some much needed perspective because if you had to choose between losing your sunglasses or getting a concussion you'll take what's behind Door Number 1 Monty.

6 Comments

Can I come visit you and go tubing? I've always wanted to do that!

FWIW, I lost my favorite pair of sunglasses in a volcano in Hawaii. Do I win?

I second the tubing thing! I'm coming too!
And yeah, I lost my favourite sunglasses while honeymooning in Cancun... watery grave for mine too... Mayan Riviera.

AndreAnna wins.

AndreAnn definetely wins.

It's all about perspective in each scenario.

:)

My sunglasses are permanently stuck to my face. I wore them at my son's swim meet last night in the 100 degree heat, and they melted there.

And I like to spell it "Mabel" not "Mable". OK, now it looks weird either way. Thanks a lot.

Huh. Now see, I would purposefully NOT pack so that I would have an excuse to buy something shiny and new. Not a virgin, like Madonna sings. But nevertheless, I deem that not stupid. You were keeping your options open.

Okay, so I was randomly looking up the Xanadu bathmat because I have the same bathroom set (and overall, LOVE IT!!!) and I need two bathmats since they get dirty so quickly! I saw your post and I had to comment.

At first I was all careful with mine and thought it was going to be a handwash thing, and then I was in a super hurry and was having company and it needed to be clean, and I washed it. And dried it. And it is fine!!! I have done it many times since then and none of the sequins is even loose, I swear. I wash it by itself and use the gentle cycle. I hang it dry when I can, but like I said - it has gone in the dryer multiple times.

Just thought I would throw that out there! :)

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